5 Tips for Inner~ Success and Being an Awesome Person

I have always been a person who thinks deeply, and considers others. Even in school when I witnessed the meanness that was going on around me with other girls, I would keep quiet, or I would say something to stand up for the ones being talked about behind their backs.

To this day, I stick very closely to this same belief, and know how being even slightly gossipy or
disloyal to another feels within me, so I choose every single day, and in every single moment to be as kind, loyal and true to myself, and real with others in all of my interactions and relationships.

I have learned some really big lessons this past year, and some of them were very difficult, painful and uncomfortable. I have learned that I must retreat, and take a mini break from my life during these times of deeper learning, to go within, and absorb the lessons.

1) Not everybody is going to behave the way that you do. Not everyone has the same love in their hearts, or sensitivity in their souls to have empathy and compassion, or appreciation for another. Not everyone is interested in self-reflection, and looking at their own behavior, or digging deep to learn how to be better and kinder to others. We all have our own shit,  but we can always choose how much of that we are going to carry around with us in our life, and throw at others. We ALWAYS have a choice in how we treat others and how we are going to show up in the world.  All we can do, is choose love and kindness in every situation we encounter, and especially love, kindness, compassion toward ourselves. How others treat us is their karma, how we respond is ours and is our responsibility- so let go of what others are doing or how they behave, and focus on your own inner growth instead. Use the poor behavior of others to ask "How can I use this to make ME even better?" Or " What am I learning in this situation?"
Remember this: how we treat others is usually how we treat ourselves. So be kind and love YOU, so you can be so full of love, that it just overflows into every area of your life.

2) You can not please everyone. It is not your responsibility to turn into a human pretzel or stand on your head to make everyone happy. When we are always trying to bend, twist, and give everything to others, we are often not putting ourselves into the equation. What do WE want? If we are spending all of our energies "people pleasing" where are we pleasing ourselves? We can get really lost and confused when we are focused on others, what they think and what they want, and lose sight of our own inner knowing, truth and desires. Stop trying to stand on your head for people who wouldn't even do a jumping jack for you. No matter how hard you try to appease others, they are still not going to be happy, and will always find something else to complain about. So best to focus inward, and please YOU, and make YOU happy.

"You will find that people will always have opinions about your decisions. Don't take it personally, it's simply because they're not courageous enough to take action in their own lives. Be a leader in YOUR life and pay no mind to those who lack the courage to do the same in theirs"---Steve Maraboli

3) We can not change others. We can only inspire others to be more, and be better, but in the end they decide if they are going to step up and make changes. Let go of judgments and trying to control others, and bring the focus back onto yourself. What can you work on? What is it about the others behavior that you can also see exists within you? Almost always, what drives us crazy about others, there is some element of that behavior that we can find within ourselves. Not always easy to look this honestly at ourselves, but what we can learn a lot from this practice. I a not saying that this is true in all circumstances, but try it out, and see what you discover about yourself.

4) Self-Awareness is the key to all other life transformation. In all of the above points, and anything else we do for our relationships, health, wellness, and eating habits, having a good relationship with our~ SELF is essential. If I am feeling agitated, angry, or activated by something someone else says or does, it is my job to pause, look inside, and see where this reaction is coming from- then decide how I will respond, rather than react in the moment. If I am reaching for the chocolate chip bag almost unconsciously, it is my job to pause and look inside to see what is going on emotionally, am I stressing or ruminating about something that is bothering me? Would a walk, meditation, talk with a friend, or a cup of tea be a better solution? We are always responsible for our own behavior no matter what is happening outside of us. That is where our true power lies- within.

5) Time passes. Life is change. Thinking too much is counterproductive. Learning to let go is never easy. We must feel our way through life, not think our way through life.
It is very difficult to let go, and flow with change. But what I do know, is that it is much easier to flow with the emotions that arise during these difficult transitions, than it is to fight them, and cling to the past, or hold so tightly we suffocate ourselves and others. We have one finite amount of time on this earth, in this body. Instead of cutting ourselves off from the pain, sadness or difficulty, it is better to feel our way through it. Allow ourselves to feel what is present. If we do not allow the emotions to flow, they become stuck and stagnant and create dis-ease within the body and mind. Take it moment to moment, day to day, and honor the process of life, and the inevitable changes that will occur. To feel is to be alive. When we are cut off and disconnected from ourselves and others, are we really living?

One theme you may have noticed here, is that all self mastery begins within us. We gain success in our lives by mastering the art of INNER~success. Once we are able to feel successful from within, it will be reflected in our outer world. Start looking inside yourself, and you will find all the answers you are looking for. 

An amazing book I am reading right now that will assist you further in achieving true INNER~success: "Success Intelligence" by Robert Holden

Wishing you abundant inner~success!

Leanne

Leanne is a Holistic Counsellor & Soul-Centered Life Coach. She teaches regular classes and workshops related to whole being health, personal development and natural healing and offers one-to-one coaching programs in person, over the phone and Skype.

Visit: www.soulworkcounselling.com for upcoming events.
She can be reached at: 250-319-3630 | soulworkcounselling@yahoo.ca

3 things to start practicing today for greater happiness, balance and stress management

There was a time in my life, not so very long ago, that I never could have imagined I would be writing about, coaching or advising anyone about living a calm, grounded, joyful, and happy life.

While I have worked very long and hard to get to a place where I am able to guide people out of the darkness they may be experiencing, and I can teach people how to find greater joy, health and well-being through my personal experiences and knowledge, I still have times when I find myself in a hot mess. Usually this is because I have gotten too busy, and let the practices go that keep me grounded, and balanced. But I am more OK with that now, because what I now know, and am about to share with you, is how to regain my emotional balance, ground my inner equilibrium, transform the darkness into light, depression into hope, anxiety into grounding, and inner turmoil into refining and resetting my priorities. I am continually assessing my life, to see what I need to let go of, and what I need to start doing more of, to restore my inner balance.

 Here are 3 things I do that work for me, and you can start doing today, to bring more of a sense of calm, contentedness, and happiness into your days.

1) Create a personal sanctuary.
One of the first homework assignments I like to give my clients, is for them to create a sacred healing space. A place they can come to again, and again, to connect with themselves. It can be simply a corner of a room that is created just for the purpose of reconnecting with, and replenishing yourself.

No matter what is happening in my life, I have this space to center myself through meditation, writing, reading, or just sipping my morning coffee or tea in pure silence. The kids know that no toys are allowed in this room, so I encourage you to set this boundary in your home as well, if you have young children that tend to take over the house!

In a space like this, it is nice to be surrounded by beautiful things that you love, and are meaningful to you, such as photos, memorabilia, flowers, plants, healing crystals, candles, incense, your favorite books, quotes, whatever it is that has meaning for you. The coffee table in the photo is from the early 70's, and was my Grannies. I have so many memories of having tea with her at this table as a little girl, and so many of my family gathered around it in her living room. It has huge personal meaning to me, and I love this piece of furniture because of the good memories it evokes.

2) Make your Self-Care a high priority every single day. If all you have is 30 minutes make it count. It is easy to fill that time with dishes, or texting, or working, and so on, however we will be much more content, productive and present for those who need us most, if we take this time for ourselves every single day. The dishes, laundry and emails can wait, better to invest in filling ourselves up so we have energy to give to those we love, and to the tasks that truly need our attention.
Take a hot bath, have some time in your sacred space doing whatever fills you up, make tea, stretch, read a book, go for a walk. It doesn't matter what it is you do, as long as it is something that brings you joy and a feeling of being replenished afterwards. My promise to you, is that if you make the time for YOU to do these things every day, you will feel like a different person.

3) Practice tuning in to your nutrition intuition. Love your body enough to feed it with love, and high-vibe foods such as raw veggies, fruit, salads, nuts and seeds. Are you craving salads suddenly,or more fruit, can't get enough smoothies or green juice? Put off of meat and gravitate toward more vegetarian foods? Or the opposite, is your body craving meat suddenly?Is the thought of a green smoothie sickening when you've spent the past month downing them no problem? Listen to these messages. If you don't

normally eat meat, and your mouth is watering at the site of a big juicy burger, or steak perhaps you are low in iron? If you do choose to eat meat, do so in moderation, and go for ethically raised, hormone free, organic when you do. (Best to avoid any extra hormones or antibiotics throwing things off in our delicate systems!)

Our body is always telling us what it needs- if we can just tune in and listen. As long as those cravings are not for doughnuts, cakes, cookies and food that does not nourish the body, mind and soul, go for it. Of course indulgences are necessary, it is not about perfection, but how can you allow for those indulgences, in a healthier way?
Some of my favorite treats come from the  Oh She Glows cookbook and blog. Seriously, if you want some healthy treats, and want to try out some scrumptious animal free recipes, this is an amazing place to begin!You can eat healthy and delicious, it just takes getting into the kitchen and creating real food at home, rather than food that comes out of a package.

Nourishing our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual self on a daily basis, is the way to living healthier, and happier, and is the key to healing any health issue of the body, or mind such as depression, or anxiety. My experience is that when life gets busy, I tend to move away from my practices, and everything starts to go sideways. Once I get back to making myself a priority, especially when I am busy, everything flows so much better in all areas of my life.

If you are struggling, feeling stuck, or just feel burned out, worn down, and not sure where to start, try out these tips.

If you would like more support, I work with people to assist them in achieving greater happiness and fulfillment in their lives through holistic coaching and counselling. For a limited time, I am offering FREE 30 minute phone consultations addressing your 3 top health concerns.
Contact me to book your appointment.

Wishing you an inspired day,
~Leanne

Leanne is a Holistic Mind-Body Health Coach and offers regular classes, workshops, and one to one coaching programs to assist others in finding greater health, happiness, and well-being. 
Visit: Soulwork Holistic Counselling for services and upcoming programs.
Contact Leanne: 250-319-3630 | soulworkcounselling@yahoo.ca
Like me on Facebook!

Getting Un-stuck: What to do when you feel like doing nothing

Sometimes doing nothing is exactly what we most need to do. There is no purpose in forcing ourselves to feel better, when what we need to do is go into the feelings and acknowledge and feel them. The truth is we have to feel our emotions to heal them- what we feel we can heal. The only emotions to fear are the ones we repress, deny, numb and don't acknowledge.

We must learn to tune in, and listen to our body to discern when we need to rest and replenish our weary body, mind and soul. Sometimes doing nothing is necessary to move us forward, and renew our motivation, inspiration, and shift us to the next level in our healing and growth.

While this can be helpful, at times, letting it drag on for days on end can lead to more difficulty in climbing back out of a deep hole of despair. People who are depressed feed the depression by staying in those low feeling energies, which only make things worse.

Sometimes, life can feel like a constant struggle. We work so hard, we try to do everything right, we fall down, get back up and keep trying. We fail, we fall, we lose, we get hurt, we are exhausted from the struggle, and feel like we want to give up. But something moves us forward, that quiet inner whisper says, "keep going"...

Sometimes these low energy moods come into our experience to prepare us for our next level of growth. I have seen this in people I have worked with, and have experienced this on my own personal journey.It is preparing you for a 'growth spurt' or a shift in consciousness. 

I have learned to just accept and roll with those bad feeling days with self- kindness and self-love. In the past I would beat myself up for feeling badly- which seems crazy to me now. Those days I just want to pack it all in, say screw it, and just go back to being unconscious of everything around me. Including my own inner process. While I have had many of those days, and even weeks and months feeling like this, now it is only short periods of a passing funk. I have built the self - mastery around moving through these tough times, and have the awareness I didn't have before to connect with what I am feeling, and what I most need in the moment.

Being conscious, sensitive and aware of everything going on within us is the first step on the healing journey. It is gritty and raw and real, but what comes from the other side of going fully into those times of deep despair, is what makes this journey so worth it.

Life has deeper meaning, we see the beauty in it all, our heart bursts with Gratitude and appreciation. We love deeply, we make a difference in others lives because we embody this real truth. We appreciate the light because we have known the darkness. The truth that we are human, and with that comes the ups and downs, the sorrows, depression, anxiety, fear, sadness, loss, hardship, bankruptcy, health issues, illness, conflicts and things that are beyond our control.

When in times of darkness, 

it is time for some extreme Self-Care.

When you feel yourself sinking into the 'black hole', or going down that downward spiral-- assuming you are self-aware enough to know when this is happening-- there are steps you can take to shift out of this place. If you want to stay in it for awhile, and that feels like what you need to do, please go right ahead and marinade in it. Cry, punch a pillow, write all of the ugliness that is inside of you on paper and burn or tear up the pages. Feel it, honor it, accept it, love it, and transmute it through to completion. Once you are done with that, here are some tips to get you unstuck from the muck.

1)  Move. Just get up and move your body. Crank the tunes, go for a walk or run. Life weights. Do some yoga. Get out into nature. Vacuum the house, scrub the floors, whatever it is..just...move. Once we start to move our body, we also move the stagnant energy and emotions within, and things start to shift. It can be common to have an emotional release after this step. When I was deep into my emotional healing journey, I would often have an emotional release during my run or walk. It is healthy to feel and allow your emotions to move through - you are doing something wonderful for your mind,body, heart and soul when you allow emotions to flow through.

2) Reach out. Connect with a supportive friend, talk to your partner, hug your kids (or anyone who is near by) it is OK to ask for support! Find a counsellor, coach or healing practitioner you resonate with, and do some inner work. When we ask for support, things shift and move faster than you can imagine.

3) Meditate. Just sit, in silence with eyes closed. If you have some healing music that relaxes you, go ahead and have that playing in the background. Listen to what messages or emotions surface. It doesn't have to be complicated. Just be still, breathe, and be with yourself and whatever is present.

4) Write. Repeating the above (sorry) . Write in a journal., write a blog, write a book, whatever- just get whatever is inside of you out onto the page. If you are worried that someone will find your writing, burn the pages right afterwards (this is my #1 favorite way to release negative emotion) and is highly therapeutic. I assign this to every single client I work with, and they always report amazing results!

5) Make a smoothie. Yes, really. Put something nourishing into your body, because live food is healing down to our cells. Make some tea afterwards, read something inspiring, rest. Nurture yourself as you would a child or friend that is not feeling well.

6) Use essential oils. I am so grateful for doTERRA essential oils. They have shifted my energy and mood on so many occasions. Serenity, Balance Grounding blend, Elevation, Clary Calm, and In Tune are all highly healing, 100% pure therapeutic grade blends that work at the cellular level, and are effective for mental and emotional healing.

Healing can be uncomfortable at times to be sure, but avoiding and denying our feelings and emotions over a long period of time, will eventually begin to create illness and disease within the body. We need a healthy outlet and a few tools under our belts to move the emotion through so it does not become 'stuck' somewhere else in the body to create disease.

If you would like to learn more about shifting to a better feeling place, managing your stress, and getting healthy from within, join me for my next Whole Health talk. Next session is:
November 30th 7-8 pm. Please follow this link for your FREE Tickets.

I hope to see you there!

In health,
Leanne Oaten Registered Professional Counsellor, R.P.C

Visit: leanneoaten.com for upcoming events and download my free stress guide while you're there.
 E: info@leanneoaten.com

7 Tips for Keeping Kids Healthy

 

Our children are exposed to so many different germs and come into contact with superbugs and viruses on a daily basis, and even more so when they are in daycare and school. While we can’t prevent them from getting sick at all, and getting exposed to viruses is what actually builds their immature immune systems, there is a lot we can do as parents to reduce the number of illnesses per year, as well as lessen the severity when they do get sick.   

As a Mom of three I am always doing many things to keep my children healthy, happy with their immune systems functioning to the best they can be. I look to the holistic model (mental, emotional, physical and spiritual) for balanced health, and consider that everything is connected. If our children are not well rested, eat too much of sugar and fake junk foods, have too many activities they rush around to every week (on top of school) and their home life is tense and stressful (with unbalanced and stressed out parents) these factors all have an effect on their immune systems and overall well-being. So, what are we to do? Here are some tips to keep in mind when considering your child’s health:

1)     Reduce refined sugars: Sugar depletes the immune system, period.  Sugar is also in just about every single processed food and packaged drinks. While 100% fruit juice has no added sugar, it is pretty close to the same thing as a lot of the naturally occurring nutrients have been processed out and later added back in. It is still a processed food and should be limited. An alternative 'soda' I give my kids for special occasions is called Zevia. It is sweetened with Stevia and comes in several different flavors. Or, try freshly squeezed fruit juice topped off with sparkling water. Read labels, and avoid foods that have more than 3-4 grams (or less) sugar per serving. It all adds up.  

2)     Make sleep a high priority:  Young kids need 11-12 hours of quality sleep per night, most take at least an hour to wind down after a busy day. I try to start the bedtime routine of diming the lights, and zero screen time after 6 p.m. on school nights.

3)      Hygiene: Teach them proper hand washing habits. Remind them to use these same habits at school as well. Skip the chemical loaded 'anti-bacterial' soaps and go for a naturally derived soap instead.

4)     Subdue stress: Kids get stressed and overwhelmed just like we do, and these days are way too overscheduled, and need more down-time carved in their days. Teach them the essential life- skill of relaxation and help them learn ways to unwind from the day, such as meditation, deep breathing, walking in nature, spending time with a pet, journaling or drawing before bed. Make sure they have regular ‘recharge’ periods during the day as well between activities. Also be mindful of your own stress levels and emotional balance, as our presence in the home has an effect on our kids well-being. Take care to attend to your own self- care and model healthy stress management.

5)     Nutrition: Whole food nutrition is the best foundation we can give our kids, for a healthy lifestyle. Whole foods as much as possible is the way to go!

6)    Support the body:  Strategic supplementation is helpful. A quality multi vitamin, vitamin C, Vitamin D, and (Echinacea or Elderberry extract when they are sick) are a good place to start. If frequent viruses and infections are present, have their blood tested for nutrient deficiencies such as low iron or vitamin D levels.

7)    Explore essential oils: Only use pure, therapeutic grade essential oils that are certified pure, and safe for ingestion. Two of my favorite products I use on my kids are the doTERRA "On Guard" protective blend, and "Serenity" relaxation blends. For fever peppermint is helpful applied diluted with a carrier oil and applies to the forehead, and "Breathe" Respiratory blend is wonderful for cough and stuffy noses. For a free consultation about how to integrate the use of oils into your family life, contact me to book an appointment. View my website here: http://www.mydoterra.com/mindbodyhealing/

Educate yourself, learn all that you can about embracing a holistic health approach for yourself and family, pass what you learn onto your children. As a parent we can do a much better job of raising healthy, happy kids if we use an ounce of prevention along with being proactive and informed about healthy living. We also must practice what we are teaching, by living well as a healthy role model for our kids. If they see us making exercise a priority, making green smoothies and taking time to relax, they will be much more open to following along! If we take care to plant the seeds of living well while our children are young, what they learn will serve them very well in the future. Teaching them how to take care of their precious mind, body and soul is one of greatest gifts we can give our children, and one that will last a lifetime.

 

Leanne Oaten is a Holistic Counsellor, and Integrative Wellness Coach. She works one-to- one with people who want to improve their health and make positive changes in their life. She can be reached at 250.319.3630 or www.soulworkcounselling.com

 

All it takes is a little inner~ shift to change your life!

Do you listen to the whispers and gentle nudges from the universe, and your higher self? Or do you ignore them, and later look back and see that ignoring them was definitely a mistake?

How many times in your life can you recall ignoring that inner voice of wisdom, and realizing later it was trying to protect you?

Perhaps it was a business partnership that you were so excited about, but had that little tug deep within saying "something is off" but you went ahead anyways, just hoping for the best- only to have it end in a negative way, or just not work out how you had hoped?

How about taking on a new commitment despite those inner feelings of discord, only to have it end up being something that you can not manage effectively with your already busy life?

We must learn to trust our inner voice, if we want to live a life of truth and a life that truly is our own. Often we take on things or get into situations for the wrong reasons, and ignore what our truth is trying to communicate to us.

I recently had the pleasure of working with a client who was in a really rough place, and her world had crumbled beneath her feet, and seemingly to her, in a very short period of time. I helped her see that her circumstances did not appear all of a sudden, but were slowly coming toward her over a long period of time, through signs, and intuitive nudges from the universe-urging her to look at her life.

It took an accident and a broken limb, lost relationships, and hitting rock bottom, for her to finally STOP and look at her life!

She was having one Aha! moment after another, and spoke of how she should have trusted her inner voice that was trying to communicate with her.

She was able to experience a positive shift in a short period of time in our working together, that lead her to some deep healing, and inner transformation, simply from learning to tune in.

The other layer to this whole mess we often get into, is that we are so disconnected from our truth, our souls, our bodies and emotions, that we start living an inauthentic existence because we are so disconnected from what we really want and need! We pursue and continue with things because we think we "should" or because it will not look good if we bow out, or our egos get in the way and identify with a certain image we are trying to create, and all of this is not even truly who we are, or what we even want! It's all a mask.

Another way we stay disconnected is by over-filling our schedules, staying attached and 'wired' in with electronic gadgets, phones, texting etc.. We literally become addicted to distraction!

  We are disconnected from our body, pain, feelings, inner voice and higher self. We don't even know who we truly are, or what we want or how we feel.

Why do we disconnect from ourselves that way that we do? Here are a few underlying (often unconscious)  reasons:

-we are avoiding looking at the truth in our lives- a failing or unhappy marriage for example
-we are avoiding dealing with the past and any trauma or hurt we carry
-we feel discomfort within our own skin, and want to avoid FEELING it.
-We have deep sadness or feelings of loneliness we can not tolerate.
-there is unhealed wounds of the past that have not been processed or acknowledged
-it is just too painful to actually tune in, and feel what is present within
-we are afraid to feel what is present, because we fear our world will fall apart if we do
-We are depressed, stressed and overwhelmed

To connect to that inner wisdom, we must get quiet. For some this is a very uncomfortable thing to do because they have never truly looked within to see what is inside of their hearts, emotions and feelings. To hear what their soul is trying to communicate to them.

I see this so often in my work with my clients, and know this to be true for myself: If we don't stop and pause regularly, tune in to our emotions (soul energy), our inner voice, how we are feeling, and actually listen to what is present- eventually something will happen that will force us to stop and look. Illness and declining health, injury, accidents, relationship problems, our children experiencing problems, repeated random mishaps (such as hot water tank, dishwasher and vehicle transmission needing replaced in short period of time) are all ways the universe intervenes to try and get our attention. If we do not hear the little whispers, they eventually become louder, and louder.

 Other big ways might be a partner leaving, friends disappearing, sudden job loss, and so on. Whatever 'it' is, will surely be something that will rattle us within, and force us to stop and look, and hopefully start taking steps in a positive direction, working to change what our soul is calling us to look at.

I see many people through my client work, as well as in daily life that are addicted to chaos and never-ending busyness. I have a radar that goes off when I hear someone telling me how swamped they are,  how exhausted and burned out they are, how they don't sleep, how their body is failing, how they have no time for themselves or to focus on making any life changes.
Often their relationships are suffering, and they have a deep void that nothing can ever fill.

On my own journey, the biggest parts of my growth and healing have come from my learning to tune in, connect with myself regularly, develop emotional awareness and awareness of 'self', feeling what is present without judgement, and learning to love myself exactly where I am in every single moment. I believe that the biggest barrier to us having the life that we truly want, full of joy, health, love and positive relationships is our avoidance of connecting within. We have to have a healthy relationship with ourselves first, before we can experience a rich fulfilling and deeply satisfying life.

I encourage you to begin befriending yourself. Take time every single day to just be present with what is, by sitting quietly, alone with eyes closed for a period of time. No t.v, or electronic gadgets, no music, or other distractions, just silence. Listen to what you hear, if you are quiet long enough you will be amazed at what you receive from this time of going within. Begin with 5 minutes in the morning, and 5 minutes before bed, sitting in silence. This simple practice, will change your life.

To enhance this process, keep your journal nearby to free-form write all that you become aware of. I have had some of my biggest epiphanies during and coming out of a meditation! Writing anchors what comes up, and we can later refer to it to see how we are evolving and changing.

Big life changes and inner transformation happen from many little inner-shifts. Change doesn't have to be overwhelming, and you don't have to makeover your entire life right away! Little shifts lead to big and long-term, lasting changes.


I assist people with learning to tune in and heal from within. If you would like to experience a positive shift in your life, please contact me about my packages and upcoming workshops.

Leanne Oaten
Holistic Counselor, Soul-Centered Life Coach
doTERRA Wellness Advocate : http://www.mydoterra.com/mindbodyhealing/
www.soulworkcounselling.com
www.flourishcenter.ca
250-319-3630

5 health trends that are not exactly healthy

When it comes to health, and living well, what we put into

our bodies is  a very large piece of the wellness

and disease prevention puzzle.

From a holistic perspective, it has been said it is more important that exercise, vibrant health starts in the kitchen.

I have expanded on this foundation, and I say foundation because I believe it is what everything else we do builds from, to understanding that it's not just about what we eat that determines our health. It is our overall lifestyle. But today, I am focusing on nutritional choices.

I do not have to be convinced that food is the biggest factor in how we feel moment to moment, day to day. If I eat crappy food, and have too much sugar or processed food, not enough fresh fruit and veggies, I feel like, well..crap! So, I do not doubt that we are what we eat.

I am always looking for ways to clean up my nutrition regime and love learning about the newest healthy super foods, and how to make things from scratch with the purest ingredients.

Here are a few tidbits I have uncovered and implemented into my life:

1) Read labels on non-dairy milk products!  Carrageenan, a thickening agent said to be carcinogenic- is in so many products that we deem as healthier options. Alternative non-dairy milks are all the rage right now with dairy intolerances gone wild, and those that choose to forgo dairy as a health choice. Again,read labels carefully, as there are some brands that do not contain any, but most of them do.
Or make your own! Cashew milk is the easiest to make. Simply soak 3/4 cup raw cashews for a few hours in filtered water, add the to a high speed blender (Vitamix is king) and blend away until completely smooth. Add more water to desired consistency, and store in a tightly sealed jar for 3-4 days. It is delicious (and full of nutrients) nutritious in smoothies or chia pudding. :)

Read: Health benefits of making your own cashew milk


2) Agave is NOT low glycemic. Apparently, from my research, is almost as bad as high-fructose corn syrup, and is pretty much pure fructose. The agave trend had a good run, but from what I have learned, Coconut Palm sugar/syrup is the better choice. Although still sugar, and should be used in moderation, it is the healthiest choice I know of. I use it in small amounts for baking healthy cookies and muffins. (Costco has the best deal for this product.)

3) Gluten- free is not healthier-in some cases. The flours used to replace the gluten based ones are usually highly refined and processed, high glycemic, high in sugar and poor in nutrients and healthy fiber. White rice flour, potato flour, tapioca flour etc are all really starchy, and combined with the high sugar content, will mess with healthy blood sugar levels. If you have gluten issues, try almond flour, oat flour (labeled "gluten free" as oats can be cross- contaminated with gluten) or coconut flour instead in baking, and the Silver Hills sprouted gluten-free bread varieties are pretty good as well.

4) Sprouted flours and grain products are best.
If gluten is not an issue for you, sprouted spelt flour is my favorite flour to use. I am not gluten sensitive (thankfully!) so this is fine for me. It is high in protein and naturally occurring fibre and nutrients, and is minimally refined. Natures Fare, and Superstore carry this four, but beware, it is pricey.

5) Don't obsess over your protein intake. Unless you are a serious bodybuilder or have some special requirements, all those protein supplements are not all that great for overall health. Protein bars can pack up to 30 grams of sugar and are highly processed! That is our recommended daily allowance of added sugar in a day- although I still think that is high. Sure use a protein powder in a smoothie, or if you are on the go, it is better option than many other things one might grab in a hurry, but remember that is it a supplement, meaning your protein should come from a whole food source most of the time. Use those protein supplements wisely and with purpose. Make healthy protein bars, power balls, cookies (with above ingredients noted) and throw in hemp seed, and other nuts for extra protein. Use the supplements in a pinch when something else is not an option.

These are just a few things I have learned (and changed) along the way. It all comes down to eating whole foods more often, and using the lesser quality, processed, packaged foods less often. The more you can make in your own kitchen the better off you will be, and the healthier you will feel. It is all about balance, so no need for perfection! Just listen to your body, it will tell you what it likes, and doesn't like based on how you feel.

Yours in vibrant health,
Leanne
www.soulworkcounselling.com

You're too sensitive! Finding balance. feeling good. and loving life as a sensitive soul

Are you too sensitive? Read on..this is actually a good thing!

Lets be real. Life can be pretty stimulating and overwhelming and there are daily stressors that we all go through in our lives that can knock us off course, and leave us feeling like staying in bed all day, and shutting the world out.  All of the pain, suffering, and mayhem going on in the world around us, can be all too much to fathom sometimes. Not to mention the day to day realities like managing a household, marriage maintenance or conflict, making sure our children are thriving, our teens are staying out of trouble and harms way, work, careers, health issues, financial troubles, family issues, and so on.

 When life gets to feel like too much, and I find myself feeling overwhelmed, edgy and impatient with my family, I know I need to take action to take care of my needs. This week has been one of those weeks, I have felt like hiding from the world. Having the kids at home full-time leaves little time for me to have my solitude and quiet, and my mediation practice has been sporadic. When I stop doing the things that keep me balanced and grounded- look out!

According to the research I have done, I fall into the category of being a  Highly Sensitive Person. also termed and empath, and fit the criteria almost completely. To clarify, this is not a disorder or anything that is diagnosed by a psychiatrist and it does not exist in the diagnostic manual for mental illness or psychiatric disorders, so it is not a mental illness, however I am convinced it is a real problem for many people, they just don't know what they are dealing with or how to make changes. I have always had many struggles with handling too much chaos, or too many things going on all at once. I become overloaded very quickly, and I have learned to  know when I am reaching the point of 'overload madness'.

 I have helped 'sensitive' clients take their personal power back with this awareness I now have, and have taught them how to be gentle with themselves, and set healthy boundaries on the energy drains in their lives.

Two of my biggest downfalls where I struggle the most, is that I tend to over- think, and over- analyse situations, and I feel things on a very deep level. I remember this being the case even when I was really young. I have heard "stop being so sensitive! "and "you think too much" many times in my life. And for the longest time, I really felt there was something wrong with me. Other people around me didn't seem to be bothered by things that way that I was. They could eat and drink whatever they wanted, survive on little sleep, and go non-stop from one thing to the next, exercise like a machine and seemingly never be affected. This has never been the case for me.

I also have to be very mindful that I don't absorb the energies and emotions of others around me. I have to take really good care of myself to stay balanced.

Over the past few years, I have learned that there is actually nothing wrong with me, but that I am just wired differently. My nervous system is easily overloaded, and I need to take extra care of to stay in check and self-aware.

I also wonder if being an sensitive soul has had a part to play in the other issues I have encountered in my life, such as depression, anxiety, and Adrenal burnout. I have done some research on my theory, and the more I learn, the more I believe the three could be connected, at least to some degree in some individuals. SELF- Awareness is key, so now that I am aware of my specific, unique needs, I can usually plan my life accordingly.

I have come to embrace my sensitivity, and now know how to protect my sensitive nature in ways I didn't know how to before. From setting healthier boundaries, learning to tune in to my mind, emotions and body's signals, to saying no to requests that I know will drain me, and paying attention to the people I surround myself with, I am now able to manage this sensitivity to negativity and chaos and I now see my sensitivity is actually a strength, not a weakness. I feel things deeply, I have emotion for other people's pain and suffering, and empathy comes very easily to me. The downside to this, is that I tend to be hurt by the actions of other very deeply.

When one of my children is upset, I can tune into the emotion they are feeling, and soothe their souls with my presence and words almost like magic (most of the time!) because I can actually feel what they are feeling, so I know what to do, and not do.

Sensitive people are highly intuitive. I am prone to pick up on other peoples energies, which at times can be a problem, but I have learned ways to protect myself from absorbing or taking on other peoples negative energy. The positives of this gift, are that I can hear what is beneath the words that are being spoken, I can feel the emotion underneath what is being said, especially when the words don't match what I am sensing someone is feeling. This serves me in my personal and professional life, and greatly assists me in facilitating the healing of others.

So, I have taken something that can sometimes be seen by the world as a negative trait, and instead of 'toughening up' I am embracing who I am wholeheartedly. I accept who I am ,and I am OK with all of me in a way I was not before.

Love yourself. Embrace who you are. You are perfect just as you are right now!

If after reading the link above titled "Highly Sensitive Person" and this blog, you can identify with some of these unique characteristics within yourself, here are a few tips on how to thrive in the chaos of life.

 Tune in. Self- Awareness is the biggest piece to the whole puzzle and is the foundation for all of the healing work we will ever do. We have to be aware of what is happening within our mind and body, in order to take corrective action.  Body awareness begins with checking in.
 Are you feeling pressure or tightness in your head? Tightness in your chest, or shortness of breath? Do you get headaches? Do you feel like you are going to explode or lose your cool? Like you are operating on your last nerve? These are all signs that you need to take a time out. Even for 5 minutes, remove yourself from the situation, and do something calming. Deep breathing, writing out your thoughts, go for a walk, talk it out. Whatever works for you, and won't harm anyone, do it!

Create rituals. Most mornings I don't schedule anything until 10 a.m. if I can avoid it. The morning is reserved for me to get ready for the day, have my coffee, read, write, and reflect. On the mornings I don't do this, I feel out of sorts, like something is missing in my day. Carving this time out just for me, sets my day on a positive note. At night, I love hot Epsom salt aromatherapy baths, listening to inspirational pod casts, and Abraham Hicks. I also read for a few minutes in bed every night before turning out the lights. All of these things take up little time, but they create structure and ground me. Find what works for you, and fit those things into your day, every single day that you can possibly do it.

Learn to say no. If you don't want to do it, and someone's life isn't depending on it, just kindly, with love, say thank you but no thank you. And move on! Save your time and energy for the things that fill you up, and avoid the things that drain you dry. Simple but not always easy.

Avoid people places and activities that deplete you.
This can be difficult when this includes family, but reducing your time spent with people that make you feel like the life force has been sucked out of you, is only going to help you reserve your energy for the people who need your positive vibes and loving presence.

If this has resonated with you at all, I encourage you to do as much reading about it as possible so you can learn ways to cope and thrive as a sensitive soul, and embrace this gift!
Here   is a good place to start!

I am here to support you in your journey.

~Leanne

Leanne Oaten
Registered Holistic Counsellor| Soul Centered Therapy
www.soulworkcounselling.com